Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Star Wars/Lord of the Rings Sweet Sixteen

1. Gandalf- An easy road so far for Gandalf Greyhame, Olórin, Mithrandir, Stormcrow, Greybeard, Tharkûn or whatever you want to call him, facing little challenge from R2-D2 or Uncle Owen
Resume: beat balrog, demi-god I think, magic, animals like him, kick-ass in battle (see picture), killer weed, fireworks
Key Losses: believed dead for a while, didn't know Bilbo had the ring, greyness
Quotes: "Pity? It was pity that stayed Bilbo's hand. Many that live deserve death. Some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo? Do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment. Even the very wise cannot see all ends. My heart tells me that Gollum has some part to play yet, for good or ill before this is over. The pity of Bilbo may rule the fate of many. "
" Keep it secret. Keep it safe."
"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work in this world Frodo, besides the will of evil. Bilbo was meant to find the Ring. In which case, you were also meant to have it. And that is an encouraging thought."
"Farewell... my brave Hobbits. My work is now finished. Here at last, on the shores of the sea... comes the end of our Fellowship. I will not say, Do not weep... not all tears are an evil."

4.Princess Leia- No challenges for Leia yet, either. I expect that to change this round. Hopefully the metal bikini will give her an edge.
Resume: daughter of Vader, princess of a planet that no longer exists, full of spunk
Key losses: dignity for kissing brother, dignity for wearing that bikini and being chained to Jabba,
entire homeworld
Quotes:"Why, you stuck up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf-herder."
" Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi; you're my only hope. "
"Someone has to save our skins. Into the garbage chute, fly boy."

3. Legolas- Had a pretty good second round battle with Merry, but pulled away in the second half. Hopefully that will ready him for this battle.
Resume: dreamy, blond locks, great with the bow and arrow, great with the sword, agile, old, great vision
Key Losses: pointy ears, susceptible to bad sunburn, friends with Gimli
Quotes: "The stars are veiled. Something stirs in the East. A sleepless malice. The eye of the enemy is moving. He is HERE."

2. Chewbacca- Dispatched Biggs and Faramir with ease. How will the Wookie do against the elf?
Resume: Tall, strong, loyal, good flyer, long wingspan
Key Losses: can't talk, furballs, dandruff
Quotes: [annoyed growl]
[concerned growl]
[excited growl]

1. Han Solo- No troubles yet for Mr. Solo. He's got it all - ladies, cash, alien friends
Resume: baller, hustler, hot girl, ship, friends, cocky attitude, smile
Key Losses: propensity to be frozen in carbonate, bounty on his head, ship is not the most reliable
Quotes: "I've got a bad feeling about this"
"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid. "
"YAHOOOOO! You're all clear, kid, now let's blow this thing and go home! "

4. Anakin Skywalker-
Won a tough all evil battle against Sauron. Will need all that the dark side can bring in this matchup
Resume: Strong in the force this one, dark side powers, hot wife
Key Losses: concept of good and evil, Jedi twins, wife, hand - later arms and legs, bad temper
Quotes: "I killed them. I killed them all. They're dead, every single one of them. And not just the men, but the women and the children, too. They're like animals, and I slaughtered them like animals. I HATE THEM! "
"One day, I will become the greatest Jedi EVER. I will even learn how to stop people from dying."
" [shouts] I hate you. "

3. Sam Gamgee- Sam won a tough battle against fellow Hobbit Biblo, and with Pippen, Merry, Bilbo, and Frodo falling, is the last of his kind.
Resume: LOYAL, carried Frodo up Mount Doom, beat the Orcs and Shelob to get Frodo back
Key losses: Frodo for a bit, fat, can't swim
Quotes: "hen let us be rid of it... once and for all! Come on, Mr. Frodo. I can't carry it for you... but I can carry you! "
"there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo... and it's worth fighting for."
"*Po-tay-toes!* Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew... Lovely big golden chips with a nice piece of fried fish."
"I made a promise, Mr Frodo. A promise. "Don't you leave him Samwise Gamgee." And I don't mean to. I don't mean to. "

2. Luke Skywalker- Used the force and beat his good friend Wedge. No he's up against a hobbit.
Resume: restored Jedi Order, blew up first Death Star, bested Vader, pretty much destroyed the Empire
Key Losses: Obi-Wan, Yoda, father, hand
Quotes: "But I was going to go to the Toshi Station and pick up some power converters"
"I'm Luke Skywalker. I'm here to rescue you."
"No. No. That's not true. That's impossible! "

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