My Favorite Muppets

You know what is vastly under appreciated and under rated?
The Muppets.

The Muppets are great. Hilarious. The Muppet Movie is classic. Here is my countdown of the best Muppets. And to all of you out there raising your eyebrows, the Muppets are fucking tight!
(Oh, and I'm not counting Sesame Street Characters)

Last - Miss Piggy - she sucks, almost so bad she makes me not want to make this list. The best thing she brought me was Charles Grodin singing.

18.) Robin - I like Robin from the Batman much better. This Robin is a little whiner. But the Muppet Babies version was funny - tadpole.

17.) Sweetums - Too big to be a Muppet? Yes, it's not a puppet, it's just a guy in a costume. Boo-urns.

16.) Zoot - Not really a big character. But one good line I remember.
Fozzie: [going over check list] Wax lips?
Zoot: [checking his pockets] Man, I just had them!
Dr. Teeth: Did ya leave 'em in your other pants?
Zoot: I don't have no other pants!

15.) Dr. Teeth - Not that funny. Leads the band, though.

14.) Lew Zealand - I'm not sure if his character is homage to anything, but the boomerang fish are pretty funny. And he did bring the paper towels.

13.) Sam the Eagle - Yeah, he is a bit stiff, but I like his style. Easily annoyed, though. Maybe needs to work on his sense of humor.



12.) Sgt. Floyd Pepper - So I get the Beatles thing now, didn't really know that 15 years ago. A good character. Works well with Animal.

11.) Kermit - So, he is the star, the main man, the leader, but he is not that funny. Sorry Kermie. It ain't easy being green.

10.) Janice - Pretty funny. One of two female muppets? (also not many human muppets) Is this true? I'm not counting the chicken. Best scene in the Great Muppet Caper when everyone is talking at once. Then Kermit or Fozzie says quiet and everyone is quiet except for Janice and she says this "Look, Mother. It's my life. OK. So if I want to live on a beach and walk around naked... Oh."
Also, I need to watch that movie again. I vaguely remember Kermit and Fozzie dressing up as Italian Pizza delivery boys. Wow, that is funny.

9.) Swedish Chef - This Cat had his own cereal. Damn. I hope someday I can have my own cereal or at least make it on a box. I remember an old Muppet show we have on tape where he is trying to kill a turtle. Pretty funny.


8.) Crazy Harry - So I had this motherfucker barely making the list, then I watched the Muppet Movie when I was home and this motherfucker is funny! Real funny. All he wants to do is blow shit up. Amazing. I feel in this post- 9/11 world there is not enough senseless blowing up of stuff. Is it wrong of me to say that? Watch the movie, look for Harry, and let me know if you agree or not. Funny. Just look how happy he is.



7.) Animal - Now we are getting to the heavyweights, Animal only coming in at #7. Wow. Animal is a great character. Also a great singer. The John Denver/Muppet Christmas album is by far my favorite Christmas album. It is the only Christmas album I own. "WON'T GO! WON'T GO!"
But animal has many great moments on film as well, particularly becoming a giant.

6.) Gonzo - Again, tough rankings, Gonzo would be number 1 for a lot of people. I only go 6. Pretty good. Pretty funny, but just not top material for me. GaGa. Likes a chicken.

5.) Beaker - Mee-Mee-Meep

4.) Dr. Bunsen Honeydew - Funny, interesting, obviously works well with Beaker. (Steve or Lindy, can you please send a picture?)
Dr. Bunsen Honeydew: I suggest we jump.
Fozzie: Are you crazy? That's about a hundred feet!
Dr. Bunsen Honeydew: I didn't say it was a *good* suggestion.


3.) Fozzie - Wacca, Wacca, Wacca. I love it.

2.) Waldorf and Statler - Hilarious. I like their style. The just make fun of other people. It is great.


Perfect with timing and ribs. Gotta love 'em.
Statler: I guess all's well that ends well.
Waldorf: Doesn't matter to me, as long as it ends.

Statler: Hey, Waldorf. Wake up. Here come the bikinis!
Waldorf: Oh, boy! We better synchronize our pacemakers.

Statler: I like the movie fine so far.
Waldorf: It hasn't started yet.
Statler: That's what I like about it.

Statler: Well, how do you like the film?
Waldorf: I've seen detergents leave a better film than this.

Ah, grumpy old men.

1.) Rowlf - This may surprise people, but yep Rowlf is my favorite. I'm not sure why. He isn't as funny as Statler and Waldorf or Fozzie or Animal, but he is # 1. I think I just liked dogs a lot as a little kid, so he's been my number one since then. He is very consistent and steady.

Rowlf the Dog: You bet. I finish work, I go home, read a book, have a couple of beers, take myself for a walk and go to bed.
Oh, and below is my favorite Christmas song. Yes!








Shoot, I forgot Scooter. He probably would come in around #13 or 14, but I don't wanna redo the whole list.