TIER 3 - B
My Sister, My Sitter - Lisa has to babysit for Bart, despite the fact he is two years older than her.
One of my favorite Simpsons lines "Go to bread." instead of go to bread. And the Bob Seeger vs. Bob Saget was great too.
The PTA Disbands - The fill in teachers were the best part about this episode.
The Last Temptation of Homer - Great concept.
Oh Mindy, you came and you gave without flaking,The Fortune Cookie joke was great too. And the fact that the person Mindy replaced was fired for asking for a real emergency exit. And this one -
But I sent you Ben Gay.
Oh Andy, you kissed me and stopped me from something,
And I
All I'm gonna use thisOh, and again two of my favorites and two of THE BEST Simpson's quotes or bits ever - First the man with the giant hand and second
bed for is sleeping, eating, and maybe building a little fort.
Homer: Moe, I need your advice.
Moe: [bored] Yeah.
Homer: See, I got this friend named...Joey Jo-Jo...Junior...Shabadoo --
Moe: That's the worst name I ever heard.
[A man leaves, weeping]
Barney: Hey, Joey Jo-Jo!
Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy - I think this episode is a testament to The Simpsons at its height. Nothing super memorable happened, no best lines or stories, but if you watch this episode, you will laugh throughout the entire thing. But just for this blog's sake, here are a few of those funny parts:
Smither's computer turning on with Mr. Burns
The kid getting his frisbee back after years and then throwing it right back in
The Malibu Stacy creator always being drunk
And Grandpa working at Krusty Burger was pretty good too.
No one bought the Lisa Lionheart doll because there was a new Malibu Stacy doll with a hat -
Smithers: "But she's got a new hat."
Secrets of a Successful Marriage - Homer teaches a class on successful relationships and ends up just talking about him and Marge to make the class interesting. The best part is how quickly homer deteriorates when he is kicked out the house
Bart's Girlfriend - Scotchtoberfest!
Bart: Why the crap do we have to go to church anyway?
Marge: You just answered your own question with that commode mouth.
Besides, you kids need to learn morals and decency and how to
love your fellow man.
[in church]
Lovejoy: And with flaming swords, the Aromites did pierce the eyes of
their fellow men and did feast on what flowed forth. Among
whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lusts of our
flesh...
"I don't want
you playing with something that has such bizarre hair. Awful, awful
hair."
And Maggie Makes Three - I love the flashback episodes, MUCH, MUCH better than the flash-forward ones.
This one starts....
{Listen carefully and my words will shape images as clear as
any TV show.} It was a tumultuous time for our nation: the
clear beverage craze gave us all a reason to live. The
information superhighway showed the average person what some
nerd thinks about Star Trek. And the domestication of the
dog continued unabated.Hilarious!
The bowling alley and the pulling out of the hair are great too and the fact that Homer didn't know Marge was pregnant until the baby shower.
Homer: Ah, another perfect day in my perfect life with my perfect job.Oh, and a little tidbit the writer of this Jennifer Crittenden also wrote the PTA Disbands and Seinfield episodes about Little Jerry, George trying to get fired from the Yankees, and the one with George taking sexy pictures, a pretty good resume.
Wiggum: [driving by] Hey, just heard the news over the squawk box.
That's nice work, Homer.
Homer: Thank you, thank you very much. It is nice work.
Apu: Oh, Mr. Simpson, I have just heard about the little bundle of
joy. Congratulations, sir!
Homer: It's true, the bundle is little, but I'm not in it for the
money.
Moe: [sly] Hey, Homer! Way to get Marge pregnant. [laughs
]
Homer: This is getting very abstract, but thank you: I _do_ enjoy
working at the bowling alley.
Homer: [sniffs] This was the happiest time of my life. I'll never
forget you guys. Especially you, Joey.
Joey: [a young boy dressed like a shoe-shine boy] See you 'round,
Mr. Homer.
Homer: Don't worry, Joey, we'll make it to California some day.
Joey: Sure we will, Mr. Homer, sure we will. [coughs]
Bowler 1: It's going to be sad around here without you, Homer.
[bowlers murmur assent as Homer walks out]
Bowler 2: Boy, this is depressing.
Bowler 3: Hey, I know what would cheer us up: bowling!
A Fish Called Selma - I don't usually really like episodes with large music numbers and episodes starring Patty and/or Selma, but this one is an exception. Planet of the Apes musical, yes!
Das Bus - Lord of the Flies parody, pretty nice most recent ep on this entire list I think, excluding honorable mention.
New Kid on the Block - One of the eps written by Conan O'Brian, not up to Monorail, but still pretty nice. Loved the Sarah Plain and Tall joke. Bart smoking the bubble pipe was good as well as not washing his hand and telling Moe it was Jimbo crank calling
Highlight of the episode was obviously Lionel Hutz.
Hutz: Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising
since my suit against the film, ``The Never-Ending Story''
Hutz: I don't use the word hero very often, but you are the greatest hero
in American history.
Bart Sells His Soul - One of the few episodes where the B story is better than the lead story. Bart selling his soul is pretty nice (QUIZ - What did Bart buy with his $5 for selling his soul?) and his prank on the church organist (rock and/or roll), but Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag is flat out great.
Moe: This thing can flash-fry a buffalo in 40 seconds
Homer:40 seconds? But I want it now
And his blowing up on the little girl, man, classic.
Homer the Great - This is a favorite of many people, the Stone Cutters episode, but I have a few criticisms. One, the long music number, two, and what was the eventual downfall of the show, what Homer being too dumb and goon-like.
Gotta like Patrick Stewert, though. Memorable ep
TIER 3- A
Lisa's First Word - Great episode, cute ending too. This one is a flashback to when Lisa was born.
The beginning of the flashback is priceless. Homer is singing Girls Just Wanna Have Fun and here is the narration.
The story begins in the unfortunate spring of 1983. Ms. PAc-Man struck a blow for women's rights and a young Joe Piscopo taught us how to laugh.
The Krusty Burger Olympic bit was also hilarious too - "Wow, a baby and a free Burger. Could
this be the best day of my life?"
The clown bed is great. The scene where Bart has to stay with Flanders is amazing. And we have one of the classic phrase repetitions, this one in Bart's head - "From now on the baby sleeps in the crib, Iron helps us play, evil clown laughter, Hello Joe"
Wow, maybe this episode should be higher.
Homie the Clown - Great laugh out loud episode ,but doesn't quite have the staying power, not as funny after multiple viewings.
The bit with the Hamburgler - "He's already dead"- and Homer's pants falling off whenever he does the little bike trick were nice.
King Sized Homer - Another laugh out loud episode that doesn't quite hold up over time. This is the one where Homer gets fat in order to work at home. Him trying to get fat was pretty funny, as was him working on the computer. The funniest parts were Bart's dream "I wash myself with a rag on a stick." And Homer trying to go see the movie but getting kicked out for being too fat. "I just wanna see Honk if You're Horny in peace", and the paying him off with a giant bag of movie theater popcorn.
Deep Space Homer -
I think you may be able to point to this episode as to where The Simpsons gets a bit too ridiculous. I mean, Homer in Space? After this, you have an ex-president moving in, the Simpsons traveling to every continent, Mr. Burns blocking out the sun, and tons more ridiculous stuff. Nevertheless, a very funny episode.
Highlights include Barney being crazy good at astronaut trying, then drinking to celebrate and reverting back to his normal self, a gag used multiple times, but still funny.
And Kent Brockman when the ants are floating around right in front of the camera.
And the inanimate carbon rod.
Two greatest words in the English language: de-fault
Bart Gets and F - This is a season 2 episodes and its simplicity really contrasts with Deep Space Homer. It is a simple likable story. Bart being thrilled with getting a D- was great, especially since it was due to his obscure French and Indian War reference, as was the unexpected snowstorm and all the fun everyone was having when Bart was studying. And if you don't think this episode is worthy of such a high place, just check out Bart's cat drawing, his only thing on the fridge.
Bart the Murderer -
Plus appearances by Troy McClure and Lionel Hutz. WOW
And the best part, Skinner's explanation of where he was. Classic.
And, who plays Bart in the TV movie? None other than Neil Patrick Harris. Yes!
Burns Heir - Another winner. Burns almost dies due to the weight of a sponge in the bath tub and then feels he needs an heir. The "tryouts" are great.
Milhouse: I have nothing to offer you but my love.
Burns: I specifically said, no geeks!
Milhouse: But my mom says I'm cool...
Burns: Next!
Nelson: Gimme your fortune or I'll pound your withered old face in!
Burns: Oh, I like his energy. Put him on the callback list.
Martin: [walks out as music begins]
Clang, clang, clang went the trolley!
Ring, ring, ring went the bell!
Zing, zing, zing went my heartstrings -- oof! [Nelson belts
him]
Burns: Thank you! Give the bully an extra point.
Lisa: [clears throat] I propose to you that your heir not need be a
boy. In this phallocentric society of ours --
Burns: Er, I don't know what phallocentric means, but no girls!
Milhouse: [offstage, in drag] So much for Plan B.
Homer: OK, boy, I wrote down exactly what to say. Just read it and
you're a shoo-in!
Bart: [walks onstage, squints at cue cards] Hello, Mr. ...Kurns. I bad
want...money now. Me sick.
Homer: Ooh, he card-reads good.
Bart: So pick please me, Mr. Burns.
Homer: {[calling from offstage] It's "Kurns", stupid!}
Marge: {No it's not!}
Homer: {Disregard.}
And the fake family was great too, and Hans Moleman as Bart. And Burns attempting to play football and the Bob Mackie blazer. And another Lionel Hutz appearance, this time with his Orange Julius and as a part time shoe-repairer. Great Episode.
Homer's Barbershop Quartet - First episode of season 4, setting the tone for the rest of the great season. Great Barney appearance. Too many Beatles references perhaps. Homer sells his spare tire at the flea market. Nice
Selma's Choice - This one is VERY close to the next tier, a great ep from the get-go.
Jub Jub, Homer's place mat, Bart pretending to be dead Aunt Gladys. She died preventing them from going to Duff Gardens. Brief Hutz appearance. Hans Moleman tries to date Selma, who thinks she now wants kids, Barney at the sperm bank.
And, you cannot forget the sandwich bit, one of the best Simpson's scenes ever.
Lisa Drinking the small world ride water
Beer Goggles
Rapping Abe Lincoln
And the return of Jub Jub
That is all for now. Tune in next time for tier 2, and I promise you, there will be fewer episodes.
Ok, Diving sucks. It is part of the game. Worse is pretending to be injured. I hate that. I'm not sure what really can be done about it. Maybe if you come off the field "injured" you have to stay off for five minutes.
